I can't nail down exactly when it happens, other than the obvious bar scenario while enjoying a few beers, but every now and again I have an intense craving for a cigarette.
Having quit almost 7 years ago, it is hard to explain the after-effects of this strong addiction. Many people will argue the urge is based on routine, which is partly true, but true smokers will tell you it's just a straight forward addiction to nicotine. I started smoking around the age of 15 and didn't quit for good until I was 32.
I think today it came because I was holding a straw in my hand in a manner that resembled holding a cigarette - completely unaware of what I was doing for a moment. I caught my daughter "puffing" away on a crayon once and it really disturbed me. How did she learn to do that? No one in our family or circle of friends smoke. Smoking is no longer portrayed on TV or in the movies she watches - or is it? Cruella DeVille is notorious for her long cigarette holder and puffs of smoke. Thanks Disney. Now I have to figure out a way to deter her from taking the path I took because let's face it...cigarettes are gross!!
Hopefully by the time she wants to explore and make decisions on her own there won't be any place left in public to smoke. Funny, but I think that would be wonderful.
And don't worry...I won't be buying a pack again in my lifetime.
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